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Nightmares and Venting

I keep having these really awful, graphic nightmares, horror movie stuff.  There's always a lot of blood and visceral detail I won't get into. Stress much? You know, when the alcoholic goes through rehab, if you're like me, you go, "Oh things are going to be SO MUCH BETTER!" and then they discharge, and they are, and then you realize you live in the state I live in and you go, "Hey wait a minute, this isn't going to last - oh...man..." and BOOM everything goes to pot. Seriously.  Now, by no means was this anyone else's responsibility, but seriously, the recovery programs here are effed up.  You're still wrestling with the 'tude of, "I kin do et mahself," and really, sure, you can, if you want to drink your liver into a weapon of mass, blunt destruction (read: scarrify it).  But when you call ye auld rehab only to find out that the counselor that helped your husband was canned and so was the director of the place as expecte
Recent posts

Wowwweeee....

It's been a whole 'ding dang' year since I posted something here. You know... It's interesting being a working mom in Appalachia, particularly  when you come across the client base of the veterinary clinic you work for.  I gotta say, if one more person explains to me the logic of using motor oil to treat their pooch's mange, I'm going to explain the logic of using turpentine to shave their balls. Moving on. The spawnlet is now a whopping 18 months old, has mastered her pterodactyl cry of doomy-doom, and has a mouth full of teeth.  After taking a year off to deal with my husband's alcoholism, because yes, I'm that special enabler, I'm back in the school game.  So I am: 40 hour workweek, 15 hour course load, infinite mommy. Oh my.  It's good times. I don't know how much commentary I'll have here, given my predisposition to paranoia.  I cain't be found out, y'all! Except I have...no followers.  So, not really that wor

Me Time and the Battle for a Guilt Free Night

I could make this whole post some social commentary about the social and cultural conditioning of women. I'll spare you, the potential reader. What I do find frustrating, however, is the backfiring of caring.  What's this, you ask?  Simple.  I love people.  I will always love people.  I will always give everything I've got to other people - to the point of self-sacrifice.  It is a conscious choice I make, one I love making.  What irritates me is when people don't quite know when to stop taking me up on it, and when I don't know that I should be assertive so that I don't reach threshold.  Threshold is a bad place for me to be.  I get very, very crabby. There are times in all of my relationships that I feel like I'm taken for granted, which, as I'm coming to learn, is really part of the human condition.  Let's face it, if we showed our true appreciation for everything others do for us, we'd be almost grovelling until we were blue and out of

Today's letter is "G" for "guilt"!

For some reason, it isn't hardwired into my brain that I can have a sick day. Which means, if I decide to stay home from class because I'm legitimately sick, if I take Special K over to her aunt's, which was already scheduled, I feel guilty for the entirety of her time with said aunt. Even though said aunt loves Special K like she's her own. Even though I'm going to do homework and make sure everything is caught up. Even though I know it's important for mommy to stay healthy and sane so she can be the best mommy for her bestest baby. Yeah.  About me. Today's theme song:  "Not the Doctor" by That Canadian woman who made a lot of money off of her dysfunctional relationship.  Hell hath no profit like a woman scorned - hell yeah!

Introducing The Student Mom

I could be really cutesy and start out with actions, or something weird, or...I don't even know. But ya see, that isn't exactly my style. What I will start out with is where I'm at: Sitting in front of my laptop, staring out of my window at my neighbor's house, periodically looking over my shoulder at my sweet little girl to make sure she's still asleep in her swing...so I can get like...five more minutes of "me" time... " Five more minutes...just five more minutes...yessssss.... " I'm waiting to take my car to the garage for an oil change, and I'm praying to different dieties (because that's fun) that the cost of the oil change stays within the $50 range, because, well, that's all I have allotted for that.  Being a foodie, we don't invade the food budget under many circumstances. So if you're reading this, welcome.  It's a simple-ish life for us.  We'll see what the day brings, and whether or